Should We Stop Living Our Lives to Be Risk Free?

Can you manage your life to be risk free? The narrative around coronavirus has convinced many of us we can.

In my new podcast episode, I question whether that is a mentally healthy belief to hold onto. No matter how careful we are, sometimes shit happens.

Download the episode here. Alternatively, listen on Spotify or YouTube below.

2 Replies to “Should We Stop Living Our Lives to Be Risk Free?”

  1. Hi Tim,

    Just saw this podcast on Anita’s Twitter post. Sending her, you and your daughter warmth to get you through. After listening to the podcast and pondering it for a while, I do feel I have something to contribute. Though I do not have children, I am 55 now, have been a physician for over 20 years, and so feel that sharing my thoughts could be of value to you . I also was raised very close to my grandparents who were born in 1900 and 1907. Wise people. They survived the 1918 pandemic, had children during the Depression, and experienced a lot in their 90 and 99 years. They, though loving and responsible parents, lost a small child to an accident, one in which they made a mistake.

    I have followed Anita on Twitter for a while now. I know how very responsible she is. I can certainly tell what a loving husband and father you are.

    So, there are several lessons in your current situation that I would tell your daughter if I “had her ear,” things I would tell my daughter, if I had one, and this happened –

    1- As long as you are generally responsible and make a decent effort to make intelligent decisions, it is ok to occasionally make a mistake. Give yourself a break.

    2- In your case, though I totally get it is very inconvenient and also very painful, the situation is completely fixable. So, you have to “forgive” yourself.

    2- As a physician, I can tell you that you are young and vital and are soon going to be on the mend. A friend of mine who is old, old, old – by this I mean she is 57 – is a very experienced skier, but a few months ago hit some ice while skiing and had an injury to her leg that required surgery and a plate. It took time, but the body does heal. Random things like that happen. She is not going to permanently stop skiing.

    3- As a woman who has traveled a bit in the world, sometimes solo, I want to add this. Do learn to pay attention to and check in with your “intuition”. I have found, particularly when I have traveled alone but at other times too, that sometimes something “just doesn’t feel right”, as if I have a “sense“ that I should not do something. I consider this to be part of my “intelligence” and over the years I have cultivated it. I obviously take in the facts of a situation, but then if I get a very strong “feeling”, I do tend now to honor that feeling and not just dismiss it. There have been times in my travels as a woman where that “gut feeling” I think might have saved my life.

    4- So, find that balance, thread that needle, do your best to discern what you can control and what you genuinely cannot. Do your best to navigate the troubled waters humanity finds itself in and still find some fun. You absolutely deserve that.

    The love in your family is going to see you through, of that I am certain.

    Best to you guys,

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